A true story and two jokes

At a recent “Career Center Seminar” that I attended as required by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts as a condition of receiving unemployment benefits, our large group of 20-25 seminar-ians was split up into smaller networking groups, after we had been given the standard presentation on how to take advantage of the various career center offerings.  Our networking groups were completely random.  We counted off by fours, and each group went into a different room.  My group had 2 marketing folks (a woman in her 30s and me), a hospitality clerk in her 20s, an administrative professional in her 50s, and a bowling alley mechanic in his 60s.

We went around the room telling our stories and I was completely charmed by the bowling alley mechanic.  No surprise there.  He was blunt and unapologetic.  His “I yam what I yam” attitude reminded me immediately of Popeye, without the weird bulging forearms and squinty eyes.  He sat there with his normally proportioned arms folded across his chest and said things like:

I know I can’t do anything with customers.  I told my boss once that my idea of customer service is a sawed-off pool cue.

Here’s how I deal with customers.  A guy comes into the alley once when I was working the front desk and says, ‘Do I have to wear these shoes?’  I pointed to the door and said, ‘No, you can wear the shoes down at Lanes & Games on Route 2.  Now get outta here!’

I’m thinking I need a career change.  There’s not much call for my bowling alley skills anymore.  There aren’t that many machines left that I know how to fix.  I’ve gotten into HTML and Java, so I’m thinking something with computers in the back office, away from customers.  Just me and the computers.  [Then he crossed his arms even tighter across his chest, leaned forward, and raised his voice.]  But I will NEVER have a Facebook or a Twitter!  I got NOTHIN’ to say, and I sure as hell don’t want to hear STUPID things from people I don’t even WANT to know!

So much for asking the guy to be my Facebook friend or LinkedIn contact.

Just to mix it up a little bit, here are a couple of jokes for you.  If there are small children or uptight co-workers around, you might want to put on headphones for the first one.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you.  I apologize for the extremely annoying ads.  I suppose they are the inevitable result of needing to fund a really great idea to keep it going.

This first one is one of PW’s favorite jokes.  She told it awhile back to a gathering of the young adult leadership team from the church.  The looks on their faces were priceless.

[blip.tv ?posts_id=1721728&dest=-1]

This second one is told by the husband of the woman who told the first one.  They are the parents of the guy who started the great website http://oldjewstellingjokes.com/ .  Worth bookmarking and/or subscribing to it.  Enjoy!

[blip.tv ?posts_id=2222586&dest=-1]

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2 responses to “A true story and two jokes

  1. The best is the sawed-off pool cue! What fun you always seem to have.

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